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Holidaying in Hospital
Your bags are packed, your accommodation has been booked and you are going away for a few days! Hurrah! Unfortunately, rest and relaxation are unlikely to be at the top of the agenda and you know you are in for a rough ride. Your head is buzzing with questions. How much will it hurt? How sore will I be afterwards? How do I cope with a new baby? Did I remember to clean out the fridge? Will my neighbours remember to put out the bins? Your house is spotless since you have been hit by the nesting bug for the past few weeks and have cleaned like a woman possessed. Despite the fact you can barely fit into your ensuite shower, let along turn yourself around once in to scrub, it is in pristine condition! Emotions are undoubtedly high when you are coming to the end of your pregnancy. You have endured 9 months of sharing your body with another and at some stage you decide enough is enough. Unfortunately, it will never be the body you once had pre-baby but at least it will revert back to one-owner occupancy.
The trip to the hospital can be a daunting affair for both parents. Although you listened intently during your antenatal classes, took down notes and diligently memorised the answers to many questions, memory failure has now set in. Your memory was faultless before you were expecting and now you find yourself sticking post-it notes up everywhere to remind you of the simplest of tasks! Memory failure is one of the side effects the professionals conveniently forget to tell you about. Maybe this is why we are encouraged to pack our hospital bags 3-4 weeks before the due date to give us time to remember, re-pack and re-check all the items before the bags are finally placed by the front door, ready for departure! Even then there is still time for us to forget. Sitting on an old towel in the passenger seat, grabbing tightly onto the door handle during the height of contractions and desperately trying not to push I blurted to my husband “you did remember to put in the hospital bags?” Panic slowly descended over his face and a quick U-turn was done! It seems memory loss can affect expectant fathers too! You cannot possibly get things right 100% first time around so accept the fact your pregnancy brain will have forgotten something. There is no need to panic, shops will still be open and friends and family will be only too willing to fetch or buy items you need. It will be like having your own personal room service!
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The Big Push
Labour can be a long drawn out affair and everyone’s experience is different. Fathers have a 50% shareholding in the baby and therefore it’s only right they should be present at the birth. However, they should acknowledge their role in childbirth is one of support and never instigate actions of their own accord. From a sadistic point of view I believe all women like their partner to be present to view first-hand the pain they have to endure! Partners will often agree to any type of demands when they see how much agony their loved one is in so now may be a good time to get him to agree to the new kitchen!
We are advised to pack many items in our bag to help pass our time in labour but this does not mean all of them may be needed! Let’s take the cooling spray for example. Granted we might be getting hot in labour as we pant and breathe our way through yet another contraction but does this give your husband the right to spontaneously spray you in the face? Having attended a couple of antenatal classes he may have thought he was knowledgeable on the subject of labour, but permission had not been granted for these actions to be undertaken. If your husband does decide to instigate his own actions during labour he’d better be prepared for hearing some unedited choice language coming from his partner's mouth! When the final push has been made, the pain momentarily subsides (it comes back with brute force a few hours later) but for the moment you experience an emotion and deep love you never knew existed. The birth of a new baby is one of the most amazing experiences you and your partner will encounter together in life. It is such an indescribable moment when you finally meet your new baby for the first time.
After the euphoria of birth you and your new baby are shown to your room. As with most accommodation venues there are different room types. Regardless of your choice, private or shared accommodation you are unlikely to get much rest. The day will start at some unearthly hour you never knew existed, with your baby at your bedside and a vacuum cleaner roaring in your ear as the last spec of dirt is sucked from under your bed! The lights will come on and the ward will be lit up like an airport runway. There will be the constant clanging as meal trays are brought in and taken away, wounds examined and babies checked. There will of course be the soothing background music of babies crying and the bellowing voice of the Ward sister as she directs her staff with levels of efficiency comparable to a Sergeant Major! Most of the staff appear friendly but there is always one nurse who seems to have trained at the school of hard knocks. Her bedside manner leaves little to be desired and you wonder whether she should re-think her chosen profession. You are sure if she were a bird she would be the sort who eat their young!
The First Few Days
The days often pass in a whirlwind with visits from the obstetricians (albeit at break-neck speed), nurses, family and friends. You brain is overloaded with information and when you try to ask questions to the professionals they seem to reply in another language. This medical jargon goes over your head and you just wish people could explain things in plain English! If you are bemused by their answers, just keep asking until you receive a satisfactory explanation. In hospital you have all the professionals under one roof (when you can get their attention!) but when you go home you will be alone. Make the most of your stay and just keep pressing the buzzer to get a nurses attention until your questions have been thoroughly answered. Visitors in hospital are always great but in small doses. Fortunately, for once the hospital is on your side as many have strict procedures in place regarding visitor times. In the honeymoon period after birth visitors are always welcomed with a smile but by Day 3 you are over them. Emotions are all over the place and suddenly you have your own milking machine to contend with. Your boobs have expanded overnight and now resemble two giant sized watermelons which would win hands down first prize in any gardening competition! If you are not up to visitors just be polite and say you would prefer them to visit when you are back in the comfort of your own home and can show off your new baby at your own leisure.
For a new Mum, holidaying in hospital is exhausting. Is it no wonder therefore a new Mum returns home feeling less than refreshed from her few days away!
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